Anxiety / Kaygi
Anxiety / Kaygi (Turkce altta) After the 15 minutes I spent crying and thinking in my bed the day I learned about the diagnosis (the 15 min I told you about in my "Diagnosis" post), I was up on my feet ready for whatever comes. I felt strong and ready to fight. It was the beginning of summer, so if chemo allowed I could spend it with friends, relaxing in the sun, finding serenity. I was hopeful and even more joyful than I am in normal life. I was even surprised at myself, I had never loved life that much and felt so positive. Yes, those were good times.. Then I was through the first 3 months of chemo, the drugs were starting to beat me down. I was feeling worse physically and that physical deprivation brings about these feelings and thoughts of "I am not well, what if the treatment doesn't work, what if the cancer is spreading just now, will I die at this age" You get the picture. I started having sleepless nights with all these going on in my head like a n...